12 DANGEROUS STEPS TOWARDS ADULTERY BY BRADY BOYD.

_“Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well...”_ – Prov 5:15–18

Adultery is wrecking marriages; but how do they happen? Adultery isn’t just the physical act, but it’s the mental, emotional, and spiritual things that later manifest in sex. For those who think it’ll never happen to them, here are 12 steps that the devil will use to set you up to destroy you. 

STEP1: YOU LEAN AWAY FROM YOUR MARRIAGE A little spat/argument, and suddenly, something’s happened to make you lean away from your spouse physically, emotionally, spiritually.

STEP 2: YOU BECOME AWARE OF ANOTHER PERSON Suddenly, someone at work looks better than they did the day before. It’s not sinful or lusting. It’s just an _awareness_ of another person.

STEP 3: INNOCENT MEETINGS BEGIN An innocent meeting leads to a laugh, a giggle, a flirt. Maybe you told a joke you shared with your wife that didn’t draw a laugh from her, and this person thinks you’re hilarious. Again, there’s no sin, no lustful thoughts because it’s not about sex at this point – but something about the interaction just feels good.

STEP 4: INNOCENT MEETINGS BECOME PLANNED This is where sin enters the equation. You’re planning to have a need met by them that only your wife or husband should be meeting.

STEP 5: YOU LINGER IN CONVERSATION In a group setting, you linger together in conversation.

STEP 6: CONVERSATIONS SHIFT TO FEELINGS We’re talking deep, personal conversations about wounds and things that really should be reserved for the intimate people in your life.

STEP 7: ISOLATED MEETINGS Both parties realize something is there, and they want to act on it. There’s probably some isolation going on at home – maybe you’re sleeping in different bedrooms, arguing more, or not talking at all.

STEP 8: ISOLATED MEETINGS FOR PLEASURE It becomes physical. You might even justify it as “innocently” adjusting his glasses or brushing her hair back, but it’s completely inappropriate, and you know it.

STEP 9: EMBRACES BECOME AFFECTIONATE Playful touching, small, affectionate hugs.

STEP 10: EMBRACES BECOME PASSIONATE Inappropriate touching.

STEP 11: ADULTERY HAPPENS The build-up of meetings, chats, and embraces culminate in sex.

STEP 12: YOU GET CAUGHT! Whether you confess or you make a mistake and get caught, you will be found out. Here’s why: the Lord loves you. It is out of His grace and goodness that you will get caught because He wants to restore back what the enemy tried to destroy in you. The only way God ever does that is to bring us to a place of repentance and brokenness.

I pray that by knowing these steps, you can avoid falling prey to the enemy’s attempts to wreck your marriage. But what if you didn’t see the warning signs and fell? Well, the bad news is that it’s going to cost you more than you think, but the good news is that there is no marriage beyond repair. The grace of the Lord is good enough and strong enough. 

Every time I read about avoiding adultery in Pro 5:7–14, I’m soberly reminded that what the Lord wants for us is better than what the enemy offers us. Friend, your spouse is the blessing of your life. In Solomon’s words, _“may you ever be captivated by their love.”_

BLESSINGS...

BRADY BOYD.